Australian Idol: Elimination - Reigan Gets Exorcised
September 18th 2006 10:19
I couldn't bring myself to write about last night's show due to its overwhelming unspectacularness. It felt just too pomo to only be able to form an opinion on how I couldn't form an opinion on any of the performances.
So i'll write about the elimination show... and elimination is certainly what it was.
Living In The Past
First we get a recap of last night's show. Andrew says last night "was like a rock opera in 11 parts"
Then they do ANOTHER recap, but a longer one.
They attack Reigan for not having chosen a suitable song for the rock show, because it wasn't poppy enough. They SHOULD be attacking Jessica Mauboy for singing Kelly Clarkson. Instead they remind us of the piddling "controversy" of Sandilands calling the pot-belly black.
Then, proving they have no shame at all, they do A THIRD recap of last night's show.
Time for an ad-break....
The Closest To Manly Ricky Muscat Will Ever Get To
When we return we see the Idols going off to Manly beach to sign things. This is to showcase their scintillating personalities such as....
Girl: "OMG DEEN HAV U RESEEVED NE MARIDGE PROPOSELS YET?"
Dean: "No, no I have not"
Girl: "OMG KAN U KUM 2 MY FORMOL?"
Dean: "-pause- yes"
It reminds me of The Simpsons when they ask Skinner in The B Sharps if he's the funny one.
Back to the studio now where Guy seems to floating with a backdrop of The Opera House. It seems pretty random for Guy to be appearing, I'm sure it has little to do with HIS NEW ALBUM "TALLER STRONGER BETTER" RELEASED SOON. Guy tells them to take risks with their performances, he says that they're "amazingly talented" and clearly is enchanted by the power of God if he could keep a straight face through that.
Group Performance:
The group performance was the most embarrassing display of AC/DC i've ever seen. Stick to Alicia Keys and Stevie Wonder please! Taking turns skipping into the centre to give each other high fives was hilariously bad. Almost as concerning as pointing to the sky when they sang "long way to the top".
For one part they run into the audience and everyone screams. I was hoping someone had poured a vat of lava into the studio, but I was wrong.
The 11 year olds in Jack Black's School Of Rock have upstaged them in talent and in class.
The Weakest Link Of A Buttery Chain
In a perfect world, the Idol elimination show would be Andrew (not James, he's a gnome), reading the following aloud instead of 1 hour of padding.
O'Damien - SAFE
Chris - SAFE
Ricky - UNSAFE
The Giant Chin of Bobby-Flynn - SAFE
Mutton - UNSAFE
Den - SAFE
Klahnssie - SAFE
Jess - SAFE
Lisa - SAFE
Latifa - SAFE
Reigan - UNSAFE
Instead it takes 20 minutes and I need to shave again.
Reigan goes and I ask myself, why doesn't she just spit protoplasm on the whole audience and start masturbating with a crucifix? (or maybe a Cedar tree is more topical)... but then I remember that this isn't the Exorcist and that would be interesting.
Kyle says that she should have chosen a more popular song. The Marcia advises the idols to do what Guy said and take risks because "What could happen!??!". At that moment Quasimodo wheels out on a unicycle holding a sign saying "IRONY". Then the camera does a massive close-up of his face as he screams "DERRRRRRRRRR".
I hope next weeks #1 hits will be a better show, but i'm sure it'll be #2............... PROVE ME WRONG Idols. With Reigan gone, we have a higher concentration of Chris Murphy, Bobby Flynn and Latifa to look at. So I'm disappointed now because now someone who CLEARLY looked like their assigned gender is gone.
I'm a bit disenchanted, what about you? Are you still loving Idol? Add a comment...
So i'll write about the elimination show... and elimination is certainly what it was.
Living In The Past
First we get a recap of last night's show. Andrew says last night "was like a rock opera in 11 parts"
Then they do ANOTHER recap, but a longer one.
They attack Reigan for not having chosen a suitable song for the rock show, because it wasn't poppy enough. They SHOULD be attacking Jessica Mauboy for singing Kelly Clarkson. Instead they remind us of the piddling "controversy" of Sandilands calling the pot-belly black.
Then, proving they have no shame at all, they do A THIRD recap of last night's show.
Time for an ad-break....
The Closest To Manly Ricky Muscat Will Ever Get To
When we return we see the Idols going off to Manly beach to sign things. This is to showcase their scintillating personalities such as....
Girl: "OMG DEEN HAV U RESEEVED NE MARIDGE PROPOSELS YET?"
Dean: "No, no I have not"
Girl: "OMG KAN U KUM 2 MY FORMOL?"
Dean: "-pause- yes"
It reminds me of The Simpsons when they ask Skinner in The B Sharps if he's the funny one.
Back to the studio now where Guy seems to floating with a backdrop of The Opera House. It seems pretty random for Guy to be appearing, I'm sure it has little to do with HIS NEW ALBUM "TALLER STRONGER BETTER" RELEASED SOON. Guy tells them to take risks with their performances, he says that they're "amazingly talented" and clearly is enchanted by the power of God if he could keep a straight face through that.
Group Performance:
The group performance was the most embarrassing display of AC/DC i've ever seen. Stick to Alicia Keys and Stevie Wonder please! Taking turns skipping into the centre to give each other high fives was hilariously bad. Almost as concerning as pointing to the sky when they sang "long way to the top".
For one part they run into the audience and everyone screams. I was hoping someone had poured a vat of lava into the studio, but I was wrong.
The 11 year olds in Jack Black's School Of Rock have upstaged them in talent and in class.
The Weakest Link Of A Buttery Chain
In a perfect world, the Idol elimination show would be Andrew (not James, he's a gnome), reading the following aloud instead of 1 hour of padding.
O'Damien - SAFE
Chris - SAFE
Ricky - UNSAFE
The Giant Chin of Bobby-Flynn - SAFE
Mutton - UNSAFE
Den - SAFE
Klahnssie - SAFE
Jess - SAFE
Lisa - SAFE
Latifa - SAFE
Reigan - UNSAFE
Instead it takes 20 minutes and I need to shave again.
Reigan goes and I ask myself, why doesn't she just spit protoplasm on the whole audience and start masturbating with a crucifix? (or maybe a Cedar tree is more topical)... but then I remember that this isn't the Exorcist and that would be interesting.
Kyle says that she should have chosen a more popular song. The Marcia advises the idols to do what Guy said and take risks because "What could happen!??!". At that moment Quasimodo wheels out on a unicycle holding a sign saying "IRONY". Then the camera does a massive close-up of his face as he screams "DERRRRRRRRRR".
I hope next weeks #1 hits will be a better show, but i'm sure it'll be #2............... PROVE ME WRONG Idols. With Reigan gone, we have a higher concentration of Chris Murphy, Bobby Flynn and Latifa to look at. So I'm disappointed now because now someone who CLEARLY looked like their assigned gender is gone.
I'm a bit disenchanted, what about you? Are you still loving Idol? Add a comment...
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Comment by Legally Brunette
My Wedding
The ACDC number was seriously bad, but I still found myself watching every second of the elimination show, what's wrong with me??
Ps, you do know it's Lavina not Latifa right??
Comment by Kim
Thankyou. You have now been hero-fied.
Well done.
Goodnight.
Comment by rhino
Comment by Marcia's Evil Twin
Comment by Madam Minx
Daters Anonymous
Australia is just not a big enough country to sustain this many seasons of idol.
Weve exhausted the talent pool. Either that, or idol just doesnt attract the right people.
Comment by Marcia's Evil Twin